A Transformational Journey (From Mystic Tribe to Purpose State)Apr 26, 2021
In 2017, my then- (romantic) partner and I (Luke) launched Mystic Tribe with the intention of elevating consciousness through spiritually-infused apparel and media. While our intentions were pure, the foundation on which we built the company was unstable. Behind the scenes, our relationship was volatile due to unconscious patterns (including; reactive behaviors, stories and emotions) creating constant conflict and separation between us. We were stuck in a state of survival, from both the financial stress that came with our “start-up” and being chronically triggered by one another, ultimately feeling “unsafe”. And so the integrity of our relationship, and business, began to steadily deteriorate, despite regularly going to therapy together and both having a spiritual practice. Meanwhile, we had a new business to run and an increasing number of bills to pay with the limited funds that we had to work with. Talk about stress. Much of which fell on my shoulders, as the “grounded” partner with a “successful” business background and the one leveraging his credit lines to keep the company from going under. However, it wasn’t long before the whole thing fell apart. By the end of 2018, I was on the verge of bankruptcy and now living with my parents in my childhood home. My nervous system was shot from the chronic stress of trying to keep the business, my relationship and finances above water for so long. And my partner became too unwell to work any longer. The time had come to throw in the towel. But, the final blow arrived on February 1, 2019. My partner and co-founder ceased communications and turned me over to her attorney to clean up the mess that we created, on my own. This was rock bottom… and the end for Mystic Tribe.
As someone whose self-worth was significantly reliant on achievement, I was broken. I felt like I had lost everything that I valued. At that point, ending my life felt like an increasingly attractive option to put an end to the excruciating emotional pain. I don’t say that lightly. I couldn’t, for the life of me, begin to fathom how I had gotten to this place of rock-bottom after embarking on a conscious, purpose-driven path. I was starting to believe that I was inherently flawed and deserving of this misfortune. On my knees, I prayed, meditated and begged a higher power to reveal to me the truth behind how I had gotten here. It was my last hope. And, just as the universe/source/god tends to do, it sent me a miracle at just the right time. And no, not an angelic being or winning the lottery, but an introduction to emotional trauma. Yes, you read that right. You see, what I learned was that at the root of the patterns that led to the demise of my relationship and business, and had me at this rock-bottom, was actually unresolved emotional trauma from my childhood. In other words, those patterns (or trauma responses) were actually just protective mechanisms that I developed in response to emotionally traumatic events from my past. In fact, these wounds and corresponding patterns were not only the source of my present circumstances, but most of the suffering I had endured throughout my life, up until that point. And so, in order for me to get out of this rock bottom and end the cycle of perpetual suffering, I needed to start healing this unresolved trauma. In a sense, I had found my light at the end of this (very dark) tunnel.
The trouble was, I didn’t really have any big, “textbook” traumas that I could recall. Or so I thought. But, what I came to understand is that there were seemingly insignificant or “normal” events from my childhood were actually traumatic. From being without my mother, in a hospital incubator, for the first week of my life to my dad’s projected expectation of “perfection” from me growing up. Even the few times my mom was late picking me up from school. All emotionally traumatic events. Which helped me start to understand that virtually every human being has experienced trauma in some shape or form. And while it’s not about the event itself, but what happens in the aftermath of the traumatic event, it’s nearly impossible for a caretaker to be perfectly attuned to their child’s emotional needs. The big problem, which I soon learned, is that at the core of emotional trauma is disconnection. It leaves us feeling unseen, unheard and unknown. It dysregulates our bodies, brains, emotions and spirits. In other words, it disconnects us from our natural state of wholeness, our authentic self and our inherent self worth. Instead, many of us, like myself, go through life unconsciously performing a series of learned, protective patterns (ie. behaviors) that we’ve adapted from these traumatic experiences. But as you may have experienced, these patterns continue to create the same painful outcomes that we want so badly to change. And not only that, but disconnection from our whole, authentic, connected, inherently worthy selves is perhaps the root of our greatest suffering as a species. My rock bottom was starting to make a lot more sense.
The good news, I came to realize and wholeheartedly believe, is that our emotional trauma is actually intimately linked to our purpose in life. How? Well, it’s no coincidence that many spiritual traditions, therapy/healing modalities, personal development programs and even our own mind/body/soul guide us back to our intherent state of wholeness and connection. Which reinforces my belief that, at the most fundamental level, our purpose in life is to return to this state of wholeness and connection. Which would support the idea that we’re born perfectly whole beings AND somehow “signed up” to learn specific lessons in this life. Therefore, we go through intentional life events (aka trauma) which disconnects us from this natural state and presents us with our life’s work (aka our life purpose), ultimately supporting our evolution, individually and as a species. But, if you’re unaware of this, like I was, then the pain and suffering that comes with this disconnection (from unresolved trauma) can feel unbearable and therefore keep us stuck in patterns that are meant to keep us “safe” (from more emotional pain). Which I learned, is what the human nervous system is designed to do. And so, rather than an invitation to step into our life’s work, most of us interpret/respond to our traumatic life experiences in a disempowering way (ie. minimizing, projecting, controlling, numbing, taking on diagnoses as our identity, passing on generational trauma to our children, etc.). Which would make sense, given that’s what has been modeled to the vast majority of us via our families, communities, society and beyond.
But I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t have to be that way. You don’t have to continue engaging in the same patterns that create the same results, over and over and over again. Take it from me, those patterns only lead to more pain in the long run. Rather, you can start deconstructing the behaviors, thoughts, emotions and/or beliefs that are keeping you stuck, and finally get down to the root cause (aka your emotional trauma), which is your direct path to wholeness and living your life’s purpose. (A process that I teach and facilitate in my “Discover Your Purpose State” Masterclass, if you’re interested in learning more.) Imagine mastering your-Self, rather than being at the mercy of every bump, along the road of life.
What I’ve realized more than anything from my rock bottom and subsequent “awakening” is the vital nature of living one’s purpose. Not only out of interest for the individual, but the entire planet. You see, what may seem like a “selfish” pursuit is actually the greatest gift that you have to share with the world. When I first started down the purpose “rabbit hole”, I was under the impression that my purpose looked something like a business, being a partner, dad and so on. But, it’s so much more than that. It’s almost ineffable. On one end, purpose is the outcome of one’s healing journey. Ending the cycle of passing on (generational) trauma and then helping others to heal, even just by showing them what’s possible. And on the other end, purpose is the filter through which you (co-)create your most optimal, self-actualized life in partnership with your higher power. This is how you create from wholeness, in alignment with your soul and the needs of humanity and the planet.
What I learned is that Mystic Tribe and my former relationship were not created from this place of wholeness, but from an unconscious desire to feel/become whole (aka “heal”). The problem was, my protective patterns fought the process tooth and nail. What resulted instead, was a tremendous amount of pain and loss. They say “time heals all wounds”, but I’m convinced that perspective and forgiveness are the secret ingredients. For, my former relationship was a mirror for the unresolved trauma keeping me stuck and a catalyst to doing my life’s work. For that, I’m eternally grateful.
In a similar fashion, Mystic Tribe showed me that the universe is always pushing us in the direction of our purpose, and therefore, our creations must be in alignment.
Where my patterns wanted me to stay small, guarded and safe, my purpose has nudged me to courageously step out, vulnerably and authentically.
And so, in the most “unexpected” place (at my lowest low), I found my life’s purpose. A primary expression of which is to help you (and all beings) discover and thrive in their life purpose.
From the ashes of Mystic Tribe (and the patterns that got me there), has risen Purpose State. A transformational coaching, media and education company through which is truly an expression of my life purpose.
If you’re still reading this, thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for joining me on this transformational journey. I honor you and look forward to serving you, for years to come.
If you haven’t done so already, be sure to connect with Purpose State via the links below. I will be sharing rich transformational content weekly, moving forward, including: podcast conversations with expert guests, transformational tools and practices, and more.
And if you’re ready to dive a little deeper, here’s how I can help:
- Download my free “Unblocking Your Purpose” Workbook
- Take my “Discover Your Purpose State” Masterclass
- Apply to work with me one-on-one
Cheering you on,
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